I can still hear the words my grandmother would whisper to herself each time she was facing a difficult time, “The more things change, the more they stay the same”, an old French saying by Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr.
It’s almost as if life was preparing me early-on for the rollercoaster I would experience as an adult and military spouse. As a young girl sitting on the front porch of my grandmother’s house, I already knew change was necessary. Moving out of state, away from my childhood home and family, this change was a hard pill to swallow. I knew this change came with positive things and while my location was changing, my family and life was not.
Change surrounds us every day. Our location changes, military commands change, the people around us constantly change. There isn’t much we can do to avoid it, so instead of running from it, turn around, take hold of it and keep a tight grip on it.
So what can you do to run towards change and embrace it?
Run Towards the Roar.
In our military lives, change is inevitable and sometimes the fear of not knowing can be most frightening. Why do we keep running away from that fear?
I recently learned it’s the responsibility of the lioness to hunt. While the females are off hiding, stalking their prey, the males will move in the opposite direction giving off a terrifying roar. A roar so powerful that it can be heard from over five miles away. Upon hearing this roar, the prey runs as fast as it can in the opposite direction, right into the lioness. Imagine the prey actually running towards the roar; they would be in a much better situation. Instead, they go directly into the path of the real danger, while it felt safer for them.
How many times have we gone with that gut decision to only be wrong in the end?
It happens so often that we tend to just stick with the less scary options; not knowing that if we just run towards that fear, we can conquer what we think will cripple us. The outcome? It wasn’t so scary after all.
Accepting the change and running towards it may not feel like an easy thing to do, but it won’t send us into a corner helpless in fear. You may turn around and view it as adventure, not a hardship.
Things will continue to change, no matter how comfortable we are in our current life. While things may appear to be different because of the current change, it was and will always be part of the same portrait, the bigger, vague, portrait, which remains the same throughout our life. We can learn to recognize we are growing stronger, embrace the wisdom and learn along the way.
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Gaining Strength Out of the Struggle
About the blogger:
Angela Caban is an Army National Guard spouse, freelance writer, published author and branding expert. In 2010, she founded the Homefront United Network, a military spouse and family support blog created to assist spouses who do not live near an installation, but also focusing on bridging the gap between National Guard, Reserve and Active Duty spouses. She has an extensive background in Human Resources and Communications, with her Bachelor’s in Business Administration and a Master’s in Human Resources. Angela resides in the beautiful Garden State of New Jersey with her husband and two children.
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