Feel Like an Outsider? Here are 3 Ways to Connect With Others


Feel Like an Outsider Here are 3 Ways to Connect With Others - USAA Community.jpg

It might be hard to fathom that someone could feel like an outsider in a world that is so connected, and while there are many way to connect with others online – what do we do when we feel like we are losing our in-person connections thanks to good ole’ technology? Or how about military spouses who are feeling isolated from family and friends due to the distance between them or a recent PCS/move?


We can also tend to feel like an outsider because we have different views, interests or perhaps have a hard time finding a start. Or perhaps you are like me, an extrovert that has somehow turned introvert because of working from home for so many years. Feeling like an outsider may come in various forms, but the feeling is never one that has us feeling confident and ready to make new friends, but one that makes us run and take cover.


Whether you are feeling like an outsider because of the military life or perhaps for some other reason, making it your responsibility to get out there and connect is the first step.


Here are 3 things to get you started and connected with others:


  1. Step out of the military circle: Living in a predominately civilian neighborhood means that the majority of my friends are not affiliated to the military. Your community is waiting for you with open arms! Don’t be afraid to be that one military spouse in the only civilian group. If your town has a Facebook page be sure to like it and sign up for any events that are coming up. Many times your town will also participate in military themed events, and you could even provide your expertise. This is a great way to build bonds over your interests and enjoying the best of both worlds.
  2. Volunteer: I know for many volunteering takes up a lot of time that you may not have, but it doesn’t need to be consistent. Find a group to volunteer monthly or quarterly (based on your schedule) and in return you may find a small community of people with a shared interest that can become great friends. There are also military organizations that have local chapters if you are looking to make new military friends. And don’t forget your kids school and parent groups.
  3. Church / Place of Worship: For me this is vital and while this may not apply to everyone – my church community is my saving grace when I needed help with childcare for my children, or just when I was feeling lonely and needed a group to talk to. Church or faith based groups also offer great support for military families – you just need to let them know you are there.

Your community can be the master key to navigating and staying connected. While having an online social life is great, there is nothing like those in-person connections made over something that you already have in common – your home.


What have you done to help you connect with others? Share with us in the comments below.


Related Posts:

Jill of All Trades: What Deployment Teaches Us About Being Self-Reliant

My Military and Civilian Communities

Focus on Your Journey Not the Destination


About the blogger: Angela Caban is an Army National Guard spouse, published author and branding expert. In 2010, she founded the Homefront United Network, a military spouse and family support blog created to assist spouses who do not live near an installation, but also focusing on bridging the gap between National Guard, Reserve and Active Duty spouses. She has an extensive background in Human Resources and Communications, with her Bachelor’s in Business Administration and a Master’s in Human Resources. Angela resides in the beautiful Garden State of New Jersey with her husband and two children.