Transition Struggles

[Whitney Cruz]

It's been a hard transition for me to go from being in the army and now I'm not. But my husband is still in so I'm around it constantly. I love the army and never saw myself leaving but I felt like back to back deployments and overseas assignments was taking me away from my children, which are now 7 and 9. I was in for 7 years since I was 21 so it's basically all I know. So now I'm in a different town wherei don't know anyone because we PCS'd from the place where I was stationed. I don't want to say I'm incapable of making friends but I don't have a lot in common with most of the wives. I'm so used to having a lot of people around me and now I feel lonely especially since my husband is Field Artillery and goes to the field every month. I'm not trying to have a sob story I just want to let people know my struggle with my transition.

[mhopes]

Whitney, I understand and what your going through new is that of a typical military wife now. I came from civilian life totally being a single mom and married my husband who is active duty military. I lived in the same location with family and friends, and church all the things I was used too. A month after we got married we pcs'd which I knew would happen but not that soon. Lol. So we all got packed up and left and ate in a small location thankfully my husband is able to come home and doesn't have to go to the fuels every month but I feel the same way. I am very friendly, and have already found a church as well but the other wives are not my cup of tea. I dunt think it's a sob story and if someone does that's their problem. You just focus on finding something for yourself to do, you've served notes it's time to find your own thing and even spend more time with your children. I hope that it gets better for you, make it mandatory!

[Whitney Cruz]

Thanks so much, your post was very uplifting. It's awesome to know that there's people that have been through my situation and  have overcame that obstacle. It's very inspiring for me because I was a single parent as well. I have yet to find a church here, but then again I have to admit I haven't been looking. But your post has really made me see that it is important to continue to have God in my life if nothing else. Thanks again and may your family continue to be blessed! :-)

[mhopes]

Thank you sooo much and God bless you all as well!

[Ms Blue]

Hi Whitney,

I totally understand what you are going through.  I too was in the Army and got out back in 2004, I loved the military but did not want to be away from my kids.  My husband is still in so I am around the military when I go on base.  After my transition out the military I worked with and around Soldiers.  That was my passion and felt at home.  Maybe you could look into working on base and doing what you love best but from the other side.  It will help with the adjustment.  

It was very depressing for me as well because I did not have anything in common with most to almost all the wives.  I also  attended a few FRG meeting but that did not work well for me.  Now I am considered a military wife but I still see myself as a Solider.  Most of my friends are all Veterans and as you stated it is very hard to fit in with military wives who have not served.  It will take some time to adjust because the closeness you felt in the Army is not the same in the civilian sector.  We are all family and I hope it wont take you as long as it took me to adjust.  Here is my email just in case you want to chat shorti_tata@yahoo.com.  You are not the only one feeling this way and we are all here to help each other through the most difficult transition in our lives.

Mirta

[Whitney Cruz]

I really appreciate all the support! I enrolled in college recently to pass the time but getting a job on post sounds like it would be better lol. I will definitely look into it. I see you are in Alaska, I was stationed at Fort Wainwright for 4 years! I'm really glad I decided to post in this forum because I have been feeling really down lately. I guess it's just easier for people to think they are alone in a situation than to really put themselves out there and make friends. 

[Whitney Cruz]

I really appreciate all the support! I enrolled in college recently to pass the time but getting a job on post sounds like it would be better lol. I will definitely look into it. I see you are in Alaska, I was stationed at Fort Wainwright for 4 years! I'm really glad I decided to post in this forum because I have been feeling really down lately. I guess it's just easier for people to think they are alone in a situation than to really put themselves out there and make friends. 

[ChazzPrattUSAA]

Whitney: Thanks for posting here! I see that you got a few responses that look very helpful!

As you continue through your transition, keep your eyes open for any signs of prior service. That could come in the form of military stickers on a vehicle, the words people say that you instantly recognize, or maybe even you stumble across a military-centered event or activitiy that draws former Veterans and Military Spouses and Families to it.

Ask around as you obviously have been and I'd encourage you to continue to ask others in your area where Veterans meet.

You mentioned Field Artillery and I can somewhat relate. It has been many years but my Wife recalls the "op-tempo" in an FA unit and the challenges to the home. I hope you can connect with some people in your area soon.

All the best in your transition. It is a tough thing, but it does get easier with time.

Best Regards,

Chazz

[Alexander6464]

I tried getting renters insurance today with USAA and because I have low credit i get denied even though i wanted to pay for the insurance in full, I live in beautiful Hunters Creek Florida but there has been break-ins lately so I call today and this is how you help the Veteran community?! I understand I have a low credit but that shoud not hold me back from protecing my home and my assets. Not what i expected form USAA

[ChazzPrattUSAA]

Thank you for your question/comment. Unfortunately, this is not something that I am able to handle here in our Community. Please give our member services representatives a call at 1-800-531-8722, or via the contact us link on usaa.com.